Caregivers’ chat

[TastyReuben]

I had never shared that with anyone until then and ya know, he agreed with me. He said that he found himself getting angry with her as well.
Isn't funny that we had the same feelings but never showed it nor discussed it.

It’s nothing to be ashamed about, we’re all human, and it’s good you recognized that early on.

My MIL stayed with us for about three weeks when she was in the mild stage of dementia, and even that tried our patience. Some things didn’t bother my but bothered me, and the other way round.

For example, she’d go into her room and unpack all her clothes from the dresser, set them out on the bed, then pack them back, come out, get a drink of water or something, then go back and unpack her clothes from the dresser, then pack them back, and she’d do that 30 times in a day. Drove my wife crazy, but I figured she was occupied, so what’s the harm?

For me, it was trying to reason with her about some things that would get under my skin. She got a standard telemarketer call on her phone, and she somehow interpreted as if she didn’t buy this thing, whatever it was, she was going to be in serious trouble. She’d play me back the voicemail, and as it was playing, she’d wring her hands and start to cry that she didn’t know what she was going to do.

My first reaction was to make light of it, and I said, “Here’s what you’re gonna do,” and I deleted the message, because it was nothing, and she flipped out over that and thought for sure the police and the government and everyone else would be coming after her. I had no patience with that, because you can’t reason with someone who doesn’t share the same reality as you.

She'll tell things she heard on the radio like it happened to her, and doesn't know fact from fiction.

My MIL would see ads/commercials on TV and think they were real, especially if the ad was written like a news report, like an obviously bogus news reader saying something like, “This just in…aliens are attacking Earth, after our supplies of delicious Oreo cookies!” - she’d think that was real.

 

[caseydog]

My dad's "little brother" -- they are 13 years apart in age -- and his wife came to visit them this weekend. My dad seemed to really enjoy that. My uncle has Parkinson's, but is on a good medical regimen and regular therapy, so it is hard to tell unless you know what to look for.

I felt terrible yesterday, but did manage to drive over to Denton to meet them for lunch along their drive home to Denver. Then back home where I took my meds and crawled into bed.

CD

 

[TastyReuben]

This may or may not be popular to say, but I do think it helps to try and find the funny side sometimes, as a way of keeping your sanity. I’ll share one:

We took my MIL on a little overnight road trip the last time she stayed with us. We knew by then that it was only a matter of time before she ended up in care, so we wanted to give her a little weekend break to enjoy while she could.

We stopped for gas, and I always like to poke around the convenience shop, to see if that have a strange potato chip brand or something, and she said she had to use the restroom, so we walked in together.

I helped her find the restrooms at the back of the shop, and the arrangement was where the doors to each restrooms were facing each other and fairly close to each other. You’d go into the left door for the gents’ and to the right for the women’s.

I told her I’d wait near the door for her and in she went.

A few minutes later, I could hear the hand dryer blowing, so I knew she was almost done, then the door opened, and she marched out of the women’s room, and without realizing it, walked straight across and went right in the men’s room.

I immediately trotted in after her, and found her looking a little confused, and when she saw me, she said, “What are you doing in here?! And what am I doing in here?! I was just in here!”

 

[karadekoolaid]

I agree TastyReuben , I totally agree. When my brother and I are with the old boy, we always try and keep up a bit of banter; just as we used to when we were in our early twenties.
The other day he was struggling to get up and cling on to his walking frame. I dubbed it " The Ferrari". He finally made it and started off across the front room, instead of into the kitchen for his lunch. I said to him:
" Hey, dad, put that Ferrari into reverse, or you´ll be getting a cold lunch".
Made him laugh, and probably made him feel a bit more positive.

 

[karadekoolaid]

Another update.
The old fella got Covid - in the hospital.
However, both he and mum got their booster jabs just last week. At the moment, he´s isolated, no breathing problems, no high temperature, no oxygen mask. Now we´ll have to test mum just in case.
Sounds horrible, but it means he´ll be in the hospital another week. That means the tests for dementia, mobility, etc. will be put off till next week AND he´ll be under 24 hour care, which is what he needs.

 

[Timenspace]

The final straw was last week. He wouldn´t (or couldn´t) move from his chair for 3 days, started throwing food and drink around and had a chronic cough. Called an Ambo and took him in at 11pm . Laid it on thick for the Ward Sister and it looks like they`re going to give him a " Full Evaluation"...
We´ll have to see.
Any further questions, message me if you want.

I am sorry for being late on the forum and this thread, and am very sorry for the difficult state our father is in. Hopefully things have moved towards ease or easier for all involved.

 

[Timenspace]

With my partner, he understands very little about what is happening in the world. I can barely discuss 'The Chase' (quiz show) with him. He doesn't understand the questions, let alone the answers. Yet, he is very good with motor skills and can do complicated mental arithmetic in his head.

Sorry for writing in late, I saw you were considering a different caregiving option for your partner...have you found one that you think is good ?

 

[Timenspace]

Dementia is referred to as diabetes 3 lately because of the direct correlations to blood sugar and consumption impairs brain cells that lead to cognitive dysfunction. This is pretty well studied and well known. A high insulin load will prevent the brain from using glucose as a source of energy because it will have excess levels and eventually brain cells die. The ketogenic diet is used to improve cognitive function because of the way ketones interact with brain cells and use an alternative pathway than glucose to allow energy to be absorbed and to regenerate new cells. There are clinics that deal in these situations so it might be something that might be be of interest to some people. Unfortunately if dementia or Alzheimer’s is in the later stages not much can be done, but getting to it soon, it does effect positively with cognitive assessment scores. Cheers

That is a first to me, really? How interesting. Of course there may be other causes as well...

 

[Timenspace]

My Mom does say alot of "I don't remember" lately and also has a difficult time trying to use her words.
What I mean is she'll start to talk about something in regards to a conversation that we're having and she struggles with it and she knows it.
I think she's very frustrated by that and in turn doesn't want to be around people... she doesn't really want to have to talk. With me it's tons of "you know" or "ummm ..." Oh and slurring ... what's that about? A stroke no one caught?

Yes, very likely, I am anot a medical expert, but it reminds me of the constant compailnts of my Mom against my Dad, so to say, that he cannot take his pills independently, that he forgets etc, sometimes I would see him start a sentence and then kind of put his hand on his head and not be able to finish it, and just say, Oh I forget...and a CT scan in the hospital showed indeed he had two strokes, that he had without other consequences but his memory loss. And disorientation. Whebn he was rushed to the er some weeks ago, he could not distinguish between the eye surgery he had just gone through and the recent incident with being uncnscious and low blood pressured...it all blurred into one hospital stay to him.

He is doing quite well in his conditions the last couple of weeks, his blood pressure is perfect, plus he walks outside and finds his way home, and I feel very grateful for that.

 

[Timenspace]

medtran49 I emphatize with all your worries and all that you go through recently. My best wishes. Stay strong.

 

[garlichead]

That is a first to me, really? How interesting. Of course there may be other causes as well...

Yes really. One of the early characteristics of Alzheimer’s is the decline in glucose metabolism and because the brain doesn't efficiently metabolize fat for energy the brain almost exclusively uses glucose as an energy substrate this has been seen as a similar situation found in diabetes hence the term diabetes 3 and this has been well known for a long time.

The brain requires glucose to be transported across the blood brain barrier for energy (APT) from certain cells that have specialized protein receptors (GLUT1) for that transport and these Endothelial Cells only represent about 1% of the available cells and they need to transport just over 100 grams/1/4lb of glucose daily and when that is dysfunctional, alterations in brains function results including cognitive dysfunction.

The ongoing research knows this and have recently been looking at ketone bodies as an alternative fuel source for the brain considering it has been well accepted that the brain prefers ketones as an energy source and uses a completely different delivers system to cross the blood brain barrier, basically bypassing the glucose pathway which results in restoring energy to the brain and consequently improving cognitive function.

Evolutionarily speaking humans have not always had a steady supply of glucose in the diet and during winter months especially in the northern hemispheres almost none, so the body has developed a way to supply energy in the absence of glucose and it's the livers job to produce and supply the body with these ketones. Basically the body switches from a sugar burner to a fat burner and it's the fat that is used to produce ketones.

The ketogenic diet is not exactly easy to adhere to, I've tried it and it is difficult mostly in the maintenance of a steady supply of ketones which basically reduces carbs to less than 50 grams a day so supplementation is the go to for most patients with AD.

Anyway the ketogenic diet or/and a low carb has in an isocaloric state has effectively and immediately reduce insulin resistance to the point that the majority of people either reduce or commonly come off diabetes medication all together and of course considering the brain would also react to the same mechanisms, hense the improvements in cognitive function.

 

[caseydog]

[Mod.Edit: this post and quite a few following posts moved from 'general chat' thread (MG)]

The day started good, but ended in the Emergency Room. Dad fell, and thumped his melon. Not badly, but the doctor where he lives sent him to the ER for a CT Scan. He's okay, and back home, but I lost several hours of time to shop for things for his new digs.

BTW, the new room is big, and very nice. I took him over to see it today. The furniture comes tomorrow, so hopefully he'll be moved in on Wednesday.

CD

 

[TastyReuben]

The day started good, but ended in the Emergency Room.

Good to hear your dad’s ok, and the room sounds nice. I know my MIL’s memory care room looked a lot like a decent hotel room, with a huge bathroom as well.

How are your folks dealing with the upcoming separation in living arrangements?

 

[caseydog]

Good to hear your dad’s ok, and the room sounds nice. I know my MIL’s memory care room looked a lot like a decent hotel room, with a huge bathroom as well.

How are your folks dealing with the upcoming separation in living arrangements?

Actually, my dad has been in the Skilled Nursing section for a few months, waiting for a room to open up in Memory Care. They are used to it.

My sister doesn't take my mom to see him enough, and the walk is too long for her to do alone. My sister drives her around the outside of the building, because my sister is carrying to the weight of two 5'3" women on one body. I worry about her, a lot.

As soon as my dad get's moved into the new room, I'll wheel her over to see him and his new room.

CD

 

[Morning Glory]

. My sister drives her around the outside of the building, because my sister is carrying to the weight of two 5'3" women on one body. I worry about her, a lot.

Glad you have a good new room for your Dad. I wish it was as good here. But maybe its only good if you have money in the US? Here, care homes are in dire straights unless you can afford luxury prices.

I didn't quite understand what you meant in the quote above? Your sister drives her around the building but they don't go in? That doesn't make sense... I must have misunderstood.