Caregivers’ chat

That's good. Are you talking about care workers coming in or residential? I need to start considering options for my partner...
The final straw was last week. He wouldn´t (or couldn´t) move from his chair for 3 days, started throwing food and drink around and had a chronic cough. Called an Ambo and took him in at 11pm . Laid it on thick for the Ward Sister and it looks like they`re going to give him a " Full Evaluation"...
We´ll have to see.
Any further questions, message me if you want.
 
The final straw was last week. He wouldn´t (or couldn´t) move from his chair for 3 days, started throwing food and drink around and had a chronic cough. Called an Ambo and took him in at 11pm . Laid it on thick for the Ward Sister and it looks like they`re going to give him a " Full Evaluation"...
We´ll have to see.
Any further questions, message me if you want.

Yeah - I'll PM you soon.
 
The final straw was last week. He wouldn´t (or couldn´t) move from his chair for 3 days, started throwing food and drink around and had a chronic cough. Called an Ambo and took him in at 11pm . Laid it on thick for the Ward Sister and it looks like they`re going to give him a " Full Evaluation"...
We´ll have to see.
Any further questions, message me if you want.

KK, TR, MG, are in the same boat. I am going through the same thing with my dad, and TR is also. MG has a partner with dementia. It's tough having to think of your parents as your children, and probably the same with your partner.

CD
 
I can see the signs coming up in DH (he's a good bit older than I am) but some day. we'll all be there.

Well not everyone gets dementia of course. But you know, if you are noticing signs then maybe try to persuade him to get it checked. It could be something else entirely which can be treated now. I first realised my partner really wasn't right when he became convinced that birds were saying his name. He still is convinced!
 
Well not everyone gets dementia of course. But you know, if you are noticing signs then maybe try to persuade him to get it checked.
This is very true. If needed, the sooner a person starts meds, the slower the symptoms develop.

I remember when my dad had his initial dementia/Alzheimer’s test. He was showing some of the early signs (forgetfulness, repeating himself), and him even agreeing to take the test was an indication he wasn’t his usual self.

Well, he took it, failed spectacularly, and then spent the next couple of weeks proudly bragging to anyone who’d listen, “Yessir, I got the dementia! I got it! They give me that test, an’ I failed ever’ question! Ever’ last one! Hahaha! Yessir!”

He never seemed to care that he was declining, which may have just been due to the way it progressed in him. One of the sad parts with my MIL was that she went through a short period of a few months where she knew she had dementia, and she knew what that meant, before she eventually slid into that stage where she didn’t realize anything was wrong with her. Those few months were really hard on her, because she knew what was coming, more or less.
 
He never seemed to care that he was declining, which may have just been due to the way it progressed in him. One of the sad parts with my MIL was that she went through a short period of a few months where she knew she had dementia, and she knew what that meant, before she eventually slid into that stage where she didn’t realize anything was wrong with her.

My partner doesn't seem to realise which is good I suppose. However, my close friend who also has dementia does realise. He is well aware of what is in store. One whole part of his brain is as smart as a carrot. For example, I can chat with him on the phone about the situation in Ukraine and I learn things about the history of Eastern Europe that I didn't even know. I can discuss films or TV programmes with him. But when it comes to more practical things, he is at a loss. He has no idea why he went to the doctors yesterday, for example.

With my partner, he understands very little about what is happening in the world. I can barely discuss 'The Chase' (quiz show) with him. He doesn't understand the questions, let alone the answers. Yet, he is very good with motor skills and can do complicated mental arithmetic in his head.
 
For example, I can chat with him on the phone about the situation in Ukraine and I learn things about the history of Eastern Europe that I didn't even know. I can discuss films or TV programmes with him. But when it comes to more practical things, he is at a loss. He has no idea why he went to the doctors yesterday, for example
That sounds so like my mother. Her recall of events in her childhood and teens plus what little of her twenties she actually does know about (60's child and way too much of drugs and alcohol) is perfect and the stories never vary. 30's to 40's are a bit vague and she has forgotten stuff I know happened and will deny it ever took place (even when my brother is backing me up) and will then just shrug her shoulders and say "oh well, it wasn't like that at all..." but the last decade or so is very vague. She can't remember what happened yesterday and her (current) husband will just shake his head or give you a sad look that tells you he knows and you know but she doesn't...

Conversations on the phone will take 3 or 4 times longer than they need to, but you just have to listen to the story 3 or 4 times and not day anything unless she actually asks if she's already told you... summing up my weekly 1½ he phone conversion with her (more monologue and me just knitting whilst she chats away) usually takes under a minute.

The only way of getting new information over to her, such as why face masks don't still you catching Covid, but still the spread of it and why hand washing is just as important, was to continually repeat it to her time and time again and actually to get her to repeat it to you. Given that she was a country midwife delivering babies at home etc, it's stuff she should know but doesn't appear to. But of you need an elderly grandmother to deliver a baby at home in a BBC production based on the 60's or 70's then my mother would be the person for the job! Lol.
 
That sounds so like my mother. Her recall of events in her childhood and teens plus what little of her twenties she actually does know about (60's child and way too much of drugs and alcohol) is perfect and the stories never vary.
My dad is like that. He tells the same stories over and over, nearly word for word, like a performance. He’s always been a natural-born raconteur, and he hasn’t lost that at all. His story about how he and his brother, in their teens, stole/kidnapped a rival’s girlfriend and kept her hostage for a few hours (and got them both expelled from school) has me holding my sides from laughing so hard every time he tells it.

However, ask him at noon what he had for breakfast:

“Breakfast? Did I even eat breakfast? I don’t know, but if I did, it was probably pretty sorry.”

He drives my brother bonkers, because my mom will stop in to see him, and she’s become friendly with some of the people who work there, so she’ll step out for a few minutes to visit one of them for a few minutes, and before she can get back, he’ll call my brother and say, “I think it’s jus’ pitiful that I been sittin’ here all day, an’ there ain’t been one single person to come see me! Pitiful!”

“Dad…Mom’s there right now. I dropped her off a half-hour ago. She’s probably just saying hi to someone or in the bathroom.”

“Oh, is she? Well, that’s all right, then! Yippee!”

Yes, he actually shouts yippee into the phone, and that happens in one form or another every day, some times more than once.
 
SatNavSaysStraightOn TastyReuben Morning Glory could we start a new thread in regards to care of our family members? Move these posts over? Not to say that we're off topic, but to be able to come back around to them in the future?
I think this would be beneficial to the entire CB community, don't you?
 
SatNavSaysStraightOn TastyReuben Morning Glory could we start a new thread in regards to care of our family members? Move these posts over? Not to say that we're off topic, but to be able to come back around to them in the future?
I think this would be beneficial to the entire CB community, don't you?
I can do that. I’ll get to it by this time tomorrow.

Just an FYI - you can click the Report button down along the bottom and make requests like this as well, and that’ll come right to us on staff as well. :)
 
My dad is like that. He tells the same stories over and over, nearly word for word, like a performance. He’s always been a natural-born raconteur, and he hasn’t lost that at all. His story about how he and his brother, in their teens, stole/kidnapped a rival’s girlfriend and kept her hostage for a few hours (and got them both expelled from school) has me holding my sides from laughing so hard every time he tells it.

However, ask him at noon what he had for breakfast:

“Breakfast? Did I even eat breakfast? I don’t know, but if I did, it was probably pretty sorry.”

He drives my brother bonkers, because my mom will stop in to see him, and she’s become friendly with some of the people who work there, so she’ll step out for a few minutes to visit one of them for a few minutes, and before she can get back, he’ll call my brother and say, “I think it’s jus’ pitiful that I been sittin’ here all day, an’ there ain’t been one single person to come see me! Pitiful!”

“Dad…Mom’s there right now. I dropped her off a half-hour ago. She’s probably just saying hi to someone or in the bathroom.”

“Oh, is she? Well, that’s all right, then! Yippee!”

Yes, he actually shouts yippee into the phone, and that happens in one form or another every day, some times more than once.
TastyReuben is Dad in a different living facility than Dad? And are they in the same area where you live?
 
Back
Top Bottom