hi

[Ellie]

Hi

I'm new here, obviously and love to cook but my boyfriend says I'm not very good at it.
So I come here for ideas help and recipes.

Ellie

 

[Cinisajoy]

Hi and welcome. Where are you? What types of foods do you like? What types of foods is your boyfriend used to?
How long have you been cooking?

 

[Cookie]

Hi Ellie

In also new here as well. I love to cook but am awful at somethings and great at others.

Does your boyfriend cook or is he used to having it all done a certain way?

 

[Ellie]

I'm in the UK, in the north. I'm trying to be vegetarian but my boyfriend is definitely a meat eater and used to things a certain way. he's grown up with his mother doing most things and getting him to help around the house is hard. I have tried but I have now given up and yesterday when he came home and asked what was for tea I told him I didn't know because he hadn't made it. he hasn't got a job at the moment and is at home all day. I don't know what he does all day but it is not the housework that is for definite. I haven't been cooking that long really. Not cooking proper meals. I don't count reheating or cooking those ready meals.

 

[Cinisajoy]

I'm in the UK, in the north. I'm trying to be vegetarian but my boyfriend is definitely a meat eater and used to things a certain way. he's grown up with his mother doing most things and getting him to help around the house is hard. I have tried but I have now given up and yesterday when he came home and asked what was for tea I told him I didn't know because he hadn't made it. he hasn't got a job at the moment and is at home all day. I don't know what he does all day but it is not the housework that is for definite. I haven't been cooking that long really. Not cooking proper meals. I don't count reheating or cooking those ready meals.

Well just ask all the questions you want. Someone here should be able to help.
Good luck retraining the boyfriend.

 

[SatNavSaysStraightOn]

Hi Ellie

Welcome to CookingBites
Best of luck retraining the BF. Mine came ready trained some 25 years ago. (yulp)... He was one of 4 boys from a working class Lancashire family and they all did everything, end of story. The only problem I ever had was getting him to help out in the garden, in particular the veg plot and digging the potato beds. He's a lot better now, 25 years on!

SNSSO

 

[Morning Glory]

Welcome, @Ellie. As @Cinisajoy says, just ask questions. Or start a new thread asking for advice about a particular dish you would like to try cooking.

 

[sidevalve]

Ask away but I must admit I find this a little sad. I come from an earlier generation with a self reliance attitude - maybe something to do with our parents being in the war - my father for example, although coming from a generation where men 'didn't cook' could do so and quite well too - I inherited such things from him. My cooking is basic but adequate [ to be kind] and I acknowledge my wife is way better. It is a little sad that many men are dependant on 'mummy' or 'the wife' or as in your case the GF - he needs to 'man up' as the current saying goes and stop being such a mummy's boy. As for being vegetarian each to their own on that one so I would advise against trying to push that one on him - he may decide to join you or he may not
Sorry for the little rant and as I say if can be of help from a male perspective just ask [although don't expect too many clever recipes from me - there are many better at such things on here].

 

[SatNavSaysStraightOn]

but I must admit I find this a little sad. I

I to find it sad but not surprising. my sister is in exactly the same position with a mummy's boy she married this august just gone. she is also having to teach him to do the housework and actually do anything... she has managed to get him to join her when she walks their dog.

Ironically our mother, who can't cook to save her life and sounds like she is your generation, was a feminist who made my sister's father cook, clean (failed on that front) and generally help out (failure there to a point) around the home. my sister however was spoilt and knew how to play one parent off against the other.

It does not surprise me that @Ellie is in this situation. my sister sadly went through several boyfriends all the same. she got away without cooking for many years because our brother lived with her in the family home our mother moved out of. my brother is the chef, literally. but he is now at uni after +10 years in the industry.

 

[sidevalve]

Your sister may be my generation but as I say I learned my my independence from my old dad - maybe the war did have some good points. Like you mentioned however he was also raised in the hard northern lands [in his case Yorkshire so maybe that has a bearing too}. However I find this problem seems to be spreading out to cover both boys and girls now - we have students going to college in ever increasing numbers unable to boil an egg almost.
As for the OP if he doesn't like something you've cooked ask him to show you how to do it better - either way he will lose. if he cooks it better he's proved he can cook, if he can't - 'nuff said.

 

[SatNavSaysStraightOn]

Your sister may be my generation

Sorry, my mother is of your generation, my sister is actually a generation younger than I am She was never interested in cooking (or anything else for that matter) and it was my Grannie, her mother that taught me when I was living with her/staying with her/being looked after by her.

As for the OP if he doesn't like something you've cooked ask him to show you how to do it better - either way he will lose. if he cooks it better he's proved he can cook, if he can't - 'nuff said.

One of my husband's work colleague has now adopted the approach that when her jobless boyfriend who has spent all day at home doing nothing asks what's for tea, her response is she doesn't know, what has he cooked. if he asks or complains about having no clean laundry, then she will ask him why he has none and where it is. When he complains that she has clean clothes, she will respond that she has them because she put hers in the washing machine (I'm not entirely convinced I agree with this last bit, because to me it should be a share and share a like) but apparently it is working slowly.

 

[Lullabelle]

Welcome @Ellie

I never learned to cook when I was at home but I started to learn when I started living with my other half, he is a fantastic cook and I have learnt a lot.

 

[Lullabelle]

My boss is now 63. Her husband died when their 2 children were quite young, she did everything for them so when they grew up neither could cook or have any concept of washing up etc... When her son met his future wife she made sure he learned very quickly!

 

[Cinisajoy]

Your sister may be my generation but as I say I learned my my independence from my old dad - maybe the war did have some good points. Like you mentioned however he was also raised in the hard northern lands [in his case Yorkshire so maybe that has a bearing too}. However I find this problem seems to be spreading out to cover both boys and girls now - we have students going to college in ever increasing numbers unable to boil an egg almost.
As for the OP if he doesn't like something you've cooked ask him to show you how to do it better - either way he will lose. if he cooks it better he's proved he can cook, if he can't - 'nuff said.

My youngest daughter raised by others is this way. She can barely make macaroni and cheese from a box. She also calls me with stupid laundry questions.
She is 26 years old and went to college. Though who knows what she did there. It sure wasn't some of her classes and she wasn't out partying either.

 

[Cookie]

Hi Ellie



It sounds like you are going to have a hard time to me. you will have to make dishes where you add the meat at the end of where you can serve the may seperately. I'm thinking about dishes like lasagne or pasta sauces where you can mix in whatever you want into half the sauce and whatever he wants into the other half and then serve it. plus getting him income involved in kitchen will be no bad thing just so that he knows what is involved in cooking and cleaning up afterwards. does he do anything in the kitchen at the moment?