The General Chat Thread (2026)

OKAY!
So I had to go back to the bank AGAIN this morning, because I didn't have of the necessary paperwork that they required to grant me access to mom's Trust checking and savings accounts in order to pay her bills.
When I had called, back when, to inquire with the bank EXACTLY what I needed and how to do all of this, it seems they neglected to give me the full laundry list.
So back I went again and sat and waited, not terribly long this time though.
I got the same very nice young gentleman and was so kind and helpful.
Now we wait.
He said that he expects that we should here back from the Estate Team by the end of the week, completing at least this one small hurdle in this never ending vicious circle called mom's Trust.
Note to self: take Mr. Banker something to thank him for his helpfulness!
 
Last edited:
OKAY!
So I had to go back to the bank AGAIN this morning, because I didn't have of the necessary paperwork that they required to grant me access to mom's Trust checking and savings accounts in order to pay her bills.
When I had called, back when, to inquire with the bank EXACTLY what I needed and how to do all of this, it seems they neglected to give me the full laundry list.
So back I went again and sat and waited, not terribly long this time though.
I got the same very nice young gentleman and was so kind and helpful.
Now we wait.
He said that he expects that we should here back from the Estate Team by the end of the week, completing at least this one small hurdle in this never ending vicious circle called mom's Trust.
Note to self: take Mr. Banker something to thank him for his helpfulness!
A 96-year-old woman's note to her bank! Priceless!
The following is an actual letter that was sent to a bank by a 96-year-old woman. The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in the New York Times.
----
To whom it may concern,
I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month. By my calculations, three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his depositing the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it. I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly transfer of funds from my modest savings account, an arrangement which, I admit, has been in place for only thirty-one years.
You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $30 by way of penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank.
My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways. I noticed that whereas I personally attend to your telephone calls and letters, when I try to contact you, I am confronted by the impersonal, overcharging, pre-recorded, faceless entity which your bank has recently become.
From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person.
My mortgage and loan repayments will therefore and hereafter no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank, by check, addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must nominate.
Be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope.
Please find attached an Application Contact Status form which I require your chosen employee to complete.
I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative.
Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Notary Public, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof. In due course,
I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me. I regret that it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your phone bank service. As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
Please allow me to level the playing field even further. When you call me, you will now have a menu of options on my new voice mail system to choose from.
Please press the buttons as follows:
Press 1: To make an appointment to see me.
Press 2: To query a missing payment.
Press 3: To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.
Press 4: To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping.
Press 5: To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.
Press 6: To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home.
Press 7: To leave a message on my computer, a password to access my computer is required. Password will be communicated to you at a later date to the Authorized Contact.
Press 8: To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7.
To make a general complaint or inquiry. The contact will then be put on hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service. While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the duration of the call.
Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee of $50 to cover the setting up of this new arrangement. Please credit my account after each occasion.
Your Humble Client...
(Remember: This was writte
n by a 96-year-old woman!)
 
A 96-year-old woman's note to her bank! Priceless!
I love that; it's called poetic justice.
I vaguely remember, many years ago, someone in the UK was fined, lets say £50, for something utterly petty, and got really, really mad.
He filled up a small barrel with 5,000 pennies, took it to the bank, then accidentally knocked it over...
 
I love that; it's called poetic justice.
I vaguely remember, many years ago, someone in the UK was fined, lets say £50, for something utterly petty, and got really, really mad.
He filled up a small barrel with 5,000 pennies, took it to the bank, then accidentally knocked it over...
I've kind of done the same thing at Walmart once. Had a cartload of cosmetics, you know all that small stuff from the HBA aisle, and was in line to checkout for 40 minutes. We got up to the cashier and said we didn't want any of that anymore; now they get to put it all back on the shelf. Waste my time...
 
Beasties, George Clinton and P Funk, Earth, Wind, and Fire, and James Brown.
George Clinton came to the restaurant I was working at in college after a show and I was his server. He was really nice and a good tipper. They came right at closing and my boss didn't know who he was. I talked him into allowing them to be served. I didn't get much of a chance to talk to him over the normal server-speak as I didnt want to be a bother.

Edited to add: someone in his group had some really good weed.
 
Last edited:
My backyard is apparently hosting a bird civil war. There have been birds everywhere lately, especially blue jays (the undisputed a-holes of the bird world). I've found two dead birds in the same spot on my patio this week alone. Between that and all the constant chirping and chasing, I'm starting to think there's some kind of territorial dispute happening.
 
My backyard is apparently hosting a bird civil war. There have been birds everywhere lately, especially blue jays (the undisputed a-holes of the bird world). I've found two dead birds in the same spot on my patio this week alone. Between that and all the constant chirping and chasing, I'm starting to think there's some kind of territorial dispute happening.
I dispute. Sparrows are the worst. Yes, those innocuous little brown birds are tiny terrorists. They took turns swarming the cardinals nest and killed all the babies. The poor, sweet nesting pair of cardinals were devastated.
 
My backyard is apparently hosting a bird civil war. There have been birds everywhere lately, especially blue jays (the undisputed a-holes of the bird world). I've found two dead birds in the same spot on my patio this week alone. Between that and all the constant chirping and chasing, I'm starting to think there's some kind of territorial dispute happening.
Find the grey bird named Pickett, and tell him to hold off on his next charge against the blue jays.
 
Back
Top Bottom