Would you allow someone to Boss you around in the kitchen?

GadgetGuy

GadgetGuy

(Formerly Shermie)
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Would you allow someone to Boss you around in the Kicthen?


A friend of mine went with me to Georgia for the week of Thanksgiving.

While there, about 2 days out from Thanksgiving Day, my grand nephew - the one who likes to cook & bake, decided that he wanted to cook supper for everyone.

So we go to the store to get the stuff for supper for those two days, and when we began working in the kitchen to get the food prepared, on the stove and into the oven, my friend has the nerve to start bossing us around, telling us how HE wants the meals cooked!!!

That evening, we made Shepard's Pie. My grand nephew had gotten some of the spices from the cupboard over the stove. He took out a small jar of dill. He asked should he put some of it into the hamburger mixture that was cooking on the stove. Right away, the friend had said; "Don't put any of that in there." I asked why not?. His reply was; "I don't want any of that in there."!!!

Well, I tore right into him & I blasted him out, mainly because I remembered when my grand nephew was up here and visited his house, he did that same crap!! I raised my voice and said; "Don't you start this crap with us again!! He's cooking, let him do it HIS way!!!!!!"

The very next day, same thing!! He said; "I paid for the food, it's going to be cooked MY way!" We were making spaghetti with sausages , chicken parm and garlic bread that evening. At this point, my blood was boiling!! My grand nephew & I, at this point, boldly put everything down and walked out of the kitchen!!! Told him that we're not putting up with him bossing us around on how to cook something, especially when I KNOW how to cook, and that if he wants it done HIS way, then he can cook it himself!!!

But he didn't want to do it! I told him that when WE'RE cooking, and if I don't ask for his opinion, to be quiet!!! I was allowing my grand nephew to cook the 2 meals HIS way, since he was the main one cooking and because he wanted MY assistance!! I let HIM run the show, not only because he likes to cook, but because I was so delighted to see him in the kitchen, doing what he likes to do best. Cooking is DEFINITELY his hobby at home!! I figured that since HE was cooking, let him do the things HIS way!!

And this friend wants me to move in with him and become his roommate?!!! Not a snowball's chance in hell will I do that!!!

Who was right in this instance? I feel that if I cook something, or if my dear grand nephew is cooking, unless we ask for an opinion, that WE should be allowed to do things OUR way!!

As for my friend, I don't boss HIM around whiles HE'S cooking. I've stopped cooking at his house because I just flatly refused to be bossed around by him while I cook!!!
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Some people like to be in control. Some people like to be controlling. Some people like everyone else to think they know more about everything than anyone else does. Its a power trip.

If you let him get away with it he will carry on. I hate people who do that. You did the right thing.
 
In my own kitchen, heck NO I would not allow anyone to boss me around. In the event of cooking in another persons kitchen, I would be open to suggestions and ideas but not to someone being out right bossy and controlling. I get that there are foods and ingredients that not everyone can or wants to eat but if I am cooking in someones kitchen it would be someone whom i am close enough with to know what foods/ingredients they not or choose not to consume.
 
I would have banned him from the kitchen! He sounds like a back seat driver and arrogant, but if this is your friend you should be able to tell them when they are guest, guests keep quiet even if they bought the food or wine.

I don't like people bossing me, if I need advice I will ask for it. When I cook at a friends house I do as they say even if it's not how I do it as I respect the fact I am in their home.
 
If I was in a kitchen where I was being paid to cook for the guy, yeah, I would just let him be bossy and in control. However, in the thread's scenario, I would have no place for anyone like that in the kitchen. I'd of just told him to go ahead and shove the food 'he' paid for up something very unsavory and went back to the store to get new ingredients.
 
Oh that would drive me absolutely nuts and I would probably mess up the dish as a result. My kitchen is like my castle and when I am in it, everyone else is out unless they can let me do what I need to do. Some people are just control freaks like that and need to feel like they have all the power.
 
My money had not come to my bank at that time, and it came the day before Thanksgiving, so there was little or nothing that I could do about the food, but to depend on HIM to get it. But still, I was not putting up with his bossing ways!! Mama always told us "that when someone else is doing the cooking, we should let THEM do it the way that THEY want to.

The sad part of this story was that I DID let him get away with it last summer!! I let that one slide. But here it is again, right back at myself & my grand nephew!! When I began to i8mmediately tell him point blank, HE TOLD ME THAT HE'LL GO OUT TO EAT! My reply was; BYE!!!

When my grand nephew & I walked out of the kitchen, it seemed that he was helpless and didn't want to cook the meal! I told him that as long as I allow my grand nephew to do what HE feels comfy wiyh in the kitchen, then let HIM do HIS way, or else we'll wait for his mom to come home!! And I meant it! We will not put up with him bossing us around!!

It's ok to offer some suggestions, but like y'all said, to just be outlandishly bossy at someone else cooking, that is not right at all!!! And it's just not going to fly!!! :mad: :eek:
 
Rosyrain said:
Oh that would drive me absolutely nuts and I would probably mess up the dish as a result. My kitchen is like my castle and when I am in it, everyone else is out unless they can let me do what I need to do. Some people are just control freaks like that and need to feel like they have all the power.
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Whenever I'm in the company of my grand nephew, and he wants to cook, I let HIM do it in the way that he feels comfy with! And yes, for someone else to boss you around with the cooking, it WILL drive you nuts!! Like you said, your kitchen is YOUR castle, YOUR domain, YOUR stomping ground.

I know how to cook, as you might already know. I've been doing it for over 50 years, ever since I was at the age that my grand nephew was when HE began cooking 2 years ago!! He was nine years old then. That loving kid was ME back then, and I want to be there for him, to help him, to guide him and to help him be the best that he can be, up to and including him being better than me!! Not to boss him around either! But to be his mentor, his helper, his guide & teacher, if you will.

I love this kid more than I life itself!! He's MY relative, even though he may make bad choices at times (kids sometimes do), he's my pride and joy!! I want him to know that I'm there for him anytime he thinks he may need me for something. I'm not letting some bossy friend make things miserable in the kitchen for him or myself!!! :mad: :eek:
 
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Shermie, I have always heard "TOO MANY COOKS SPOIL THE BROTH" and with that in mind I control my kitchen. I call the shots in my kitchen. If I want open house then that's another thing. I am really "bad"with this. I really never want help when I am cooking for guest. The most I will ask for is someone who's not a known cook but a good helper. I usually only want help with some prep work which I have to supervise and with cleaning. Other than that stay out of my kitchen and wait until the meal is served.

On the other hand if I come to your place, I offer to help as a courtesy and work with your rules even if it's not my approach. I respect people's kitchen and I expect people to respect mine. It's very simple.

At the end of the day don't let it stress you out too much Shermie. We have more fried turkey to eat next ThanksGiving:wink:.
 
That's right!!

My grand nephew is my pride & joy! I am very protective of him and his siblings.

In reality, that is HIS kitchen as well as his mom & dad's kitchen. He lives there, he cooks there! And for him & I to be bossed around by my friend, I'm NOT HAVING it!!

This is MY golden opportunity to help him shine when I'm able to!! I ENJOY teaching him the tools of the trade!! Of course, his parents do it also. He's a very fast learner, and he greatly APPRECIATES ME working with him side by side!! He sometimes wants to do his thing by himself, and I respect that! But I'm always there for him, standing by for him if & when he needs me! He catches on very fast! :wink:
 
In our kitchen I am always the boss...When I am cooking I usually do not allow anybody to interfere in my activities.. But sometimes if I have to cook many foods for an occasion in the house I ask their help for some simple task in the kitchen..Most of the time I am always telling my family to wait until I am finish cooking and let them do to set the table before we dine to eat.
 
And here's another kicker!

Last week, this same person, while we were on the way back from Georgia had stated bossing me around about MY cell phone, saying; "You need to put that away and stop playing that stupid loud and annoying game that you have on there. It is childish and it is only for kids to use." My reply was;

"EXCUSE ME!! This is MY phone, not yours!! I pay the bill every month, not you!! I do what I want with it!! If you don't like it, oh well. Tough!! Deal with it & get over it!!!"

I'm seriously considering saying goodbye to him and ending the friendship with him if he starts up with this crap again!!! I'm so sick to death of his bossing & control freak ways!!!!!! :mad: :eek:
 
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