How do we communicate?

[MypinchofItaly]

Taking up a bit the recent thread "Have you ever sent an embarrassing text or email?", in the various answers, it was developing a topic in my opinion very interesting, started with @Duck59 and I would like to deepen in this new thread.
Communication and its consequences, whatever they may be.
Undoubtedly, we all communicate. But how? Right? Wrong?
And what establishes the right or wrong way? How many ways are there and do we use to communicate? it Is not always easy to be able to communicate ... there are nuances, contexts, time,characters that must be taken into consideration and of course there is the verbal and non-verbal communication.
Sometimes we do it directly, others do not, depending on the context or even apart from it, with people we know well and others less ... in short, what kind of communicators are we? Always the same or do we adapt according to who we are facing and from the context? And what do we prefer as a means to do it? Mail, de visu, whatsApp, sms, blog, forums,letters, gestures, silences?
Let's communicate then!

 

[Morning Glory]

Huge topic!

I'm very interested in how people communicate using text on-line. Be it email, texting, on forums, whatsAp or whatever. Some people are better at it than others! One of the main problems is that we are communicating using text alone - but we are not writing 'formally'. We write in a kind of 'speak' as if we were having a conversation. Yet we aren't able to read intonation or gesture. Its no wonder that things get misunderstood sometimes. Emoticons are quite useful in this respect, crude as they may be. At least, you are able to indicate, for example, that you mean something in good humour.

 

[MypinchofItaly]

yes it is true, usually there is the habit of writing online as if were talking in person .. for someone it is almost natural to do it, for others less. Depends on what? Certain contexts help "the conversation" online facilitating communication. I think it is an important example (with the necessary exceptions) of customizing an instrument. It is we who decide (or not) to use communication using a means of communication that often becomes a mirror. I believe it is also due to the fact that wherever we are "recruited" to communicate, to personalize, to say, to express.
Unknowingly, we let our ego flow into our fingers that become our mouths.

 

[Francesca]

@MypinchofItaly

Bravo Dear .. Pleased to see that you have taken the topic, a step further ..

Speaking Strategies: These play an essential part of an effective conversation ( semi formal or infornal ) and these strategies are presented either as a conversation or as a formal professional discussion.

In Spain, I use my cell Tablet Mobile alot more often than I use email if it is not business. I do not what´s app my sons or email my parents or grand parents daily, just when travelling ..

Cooking Bites or other Social Red formats: These "chats" or discussions ( depending on topic), normally, thought out and cautiously expressing one´s opinions or views with caution ( you do not know the people you are communicating with) and sharing personal experiences with unknowns could present dangers.

Some questions, I find intrusive and prefer to refrain from what I judge as inappropriate.

Writing food comments or views on a recipe or gastronomic question, could present a roughly designed outline of one´s view with some details about how one might handle the recipe ..

Of course, there are those whom one may connect to immediately and those who one might not connect to .. It is common on all food fórums ..

Face to face communications over a café or wine, for me are still the best type of communications and the results are far more authentic ..

Gestures, smiles, laughter and even a tear or two are human emotions and sharing these emotions with a dear friend or family member on some battery operated phone device, do not cut it for me !

Have a lovely evening and thank you for posting ..

 

[classic33]

When "writing" a letter/e-mail the wording changes. Visual & audio clues that are present when talking to the person are missing.

Talking to the person face to face allows both the visual & audio clues to be seen/heard. I'll often say less, relying a bit more on what is said and how(fast, slow, tone of voice).

 

[classic33]

Which ever form of communication is used, what I hate is the other person acting as though they know me personally. Most of the time they don't. Get this more in phone calls than in person.

Regional words don't always translate very well, especially with a heavy accent. Again worse in phonecalls than face to face.

Worked in a call center, (we all love it when they call) where the instructions were "Never Assume".
That the person will know what you are on about, from the outset.
That the person doesn't know what they are talking about. Subject wise.
That the person will be able/want to take the call then & there. Listen for the audio clues, wording used, pauses.

Worked in a shop, and it was treat the customer as though they were an idiot. With no idea of what they want. Deal with them and get their money, as quick as possible. Sell them what ever they wanted, whether it would be needed or not.

I preferred to be honest, and listen to them first then advise. Didn't go down well to begin with, but the sales soon proved it worked. That's face to face and over the phone or via e-mails.

 

[MypinchofItaly]

When "writing" a letter/e-mail the wording changes. Visual & audio clues that are present when talking to the person are missing.

Talking to the person face to face allows both the visual & audio clues to be seen/heard. I'll often say less, relying a bit more on what is said and how(fast, slow, tone of voice).

Visual clues are certainly fundamental in a conversation de visu. What is said, told during a meeting, conversation or simple chat that is, is largely composed by non-verbal communication (i.e. gestures, posture, even imperceptible movements that however are felt). In my previous life I was in charge of personnel selection. I remember once during a job interview, a guy who most of the time had his hands firmly planted on the chair like saying "I'm so tense, I can not wait to escape away", despite his words had a reassuring tone and he was sure of himself. Our body speaks its own language and it is very difficult it lies.

 

[MypinchofItaly]

I preferred to be honest, and listen to them first then advise. Didn't go down well to begin with, but the sales soon proved it worked.

Well done.

 

[MypinchofItaly]

@MypinchofItaly

Bravo Dear .. Pleased to see that you have taken the topic, a step further ..

Speaking Strategies: These play an essential part of an effective conversation ( semi formal or infornal ) and these strategies are presented either as a conversation or as a formal professional discussion.

In Spain, I use my cell Tablet Mobile alot more often than I use email if it is not business. I do not what´s app my sons or email my parents or grand parents daily, just when travelling ..

Cooking Bites or other Social Red formats: These "chats" or discussions ( depending on topic), normally, thought out and cautiously expressing one´s opinions or views with caution ( you do not know the people you are communicating with) and sharing personal experiences with unknowns could present dangers.

Some questions, I find intrusive and prefer to refrain from what I judge as inappropriate.

Writing food comments or views on a recipe or gastronomic question, could present a roughly designed outline of one´s view with some details about how one might handle the recipe ..

Of course, there are those whom one may connect to immediately and those who one might not connect to .. It is common on all food fórums ..

Face to face communications over a café or wine, for me are still the best type of communications and the results are far more authentic ..

Gestures, smiles, laughter and even a tear or two are human emotions and sharing these emotions with a dear friend or family member on some battery operated phone device, do not cut it for me !

Have a lovely evening and thank you for posting ..

Taking the example you cited of cookingbites, it can happen that, although not known at all, create "sensations to skin" both in negative and in positive (rather contradictory term thinking about the fact that we are just typing).
For me too the communication de visu is fundamental especially with those who know each other. There is a familiarity that must be preserved.

 

[classic33]

Worked outside where the communication was hand and arm gestures only. Also in a factory where "basic lip reading" was combined with hand gestures.

Got taught a few rude words, by a women whose mouth wouldn't melt butter, in sign language.

 

[MypinchofItaly]

Worked outside where the communication was hand and arm gestures only. Also in a factory where "basic lip reading" was combined with hand gestures.

Got taught a few rude words, by a women whose mouth wouldn't melt butter, in sign language.

Sorry @classic33, I'm not sure to understand your post...do you mean that you have worked with deaf and dumb for sign language?

 

[classic33]

Sorry @classic33, I'm not sure to understand your post...do you mean that you have worked with deaf and dumb for sign language?

Served deaf people, including the woman who taught me a few rude words. Outside, it was a case of distance and or noise that required the arm and hand gestures. Noise in the factory, which also meant less walking required.

 

[Duck59]

When I studied this sort of thing, I was a bit sceptical about the concept that any form of communication could have a creative element. However, once I had really got into the subject, I realised that I was wrong; in fact, I would say that there is a form of creativity in anything that could be described as a communicative process.

I suppose that, originally, I had formed the slightly snooty attitude that you only found creativity in things like literary works. It didn't take too long to discover that this was wrong and it was quite fun looking for creativity in more mundane forms of communication. We could perhaps describe this as everyday creativity as opposed to literary creativity.

There are all sorts of elements to this. We consider the message we need to convey; we consider who the recipient of the message is and tailor our communication to them; our use of language varies according to the circumstances; in short, there is a whole heap of creative activity going on surrounding any form of communication.

Here's one thing I came up with: a shopping receipt. How is that in any way creative? It is, though. It has to be designed and it has to convey relevant information in a very short space. I had some first-hand experience of this when I worked as a programmer for a large bookseller. We needed to consider how to fit book titles onto both receipts and the EPOS (electronic point of sale) system. Some things are easy enough. For example, you can reduce the word encyclopaedia to "ency." and it's pretty clear what it means. But other things were harder; someone had the idea of removing "A" or "The" from book titles, but that doesn't work too well. Imagine, say, the Jack London novel The Call of the Wild. That's going to look a bit silly if it's written up as "Call of Wild." So, even a shop receipt can have some creative processes.

 

[classic33]

You want creative communication without a word being spoken, search for the carrier take-off routine. Failing that a search for police on point duty, directing traffic.

 

[MypinchofItaly]

When I studied this sort of thing, I was a bit sceptical about the concept that any form of communication could have a creative element. However, once I had really got into the subject, I realised that I was wrong; in fact, I would say that there is a form of creativity in anything that could be described as a communicative process.

I suppose that, originally, I had formed the slightly snooty attitude that you only found creativity in things like literary works. It didn't take too long to discover that this was wrong and it was quite fun looking for creativity in more mundane forms of communication. We could perhaps describe this as everyday creativity as opposed to literary creativity.

There are all sorts of elements to this. We consider the message we need to convey; we consider who the recipient of the message is and tailor our communication to them; our use of language varies according to the circumstances; in short, there is a whole heap of creative activity going on surrounding any form of communication.

Here's one thing I came up with: a shopping receipt. How is that in any way creative? It is, though. It has to be designed and it has to convey relevant information in a very short space. I had some first-hand experience of this when I worked as a programmer for a large bookseller. We needed to consider how to fit book titles onto both receipts and the EPOS (electronic point of sale) system. Some things are easy enough. For example, you can reduce the word encyclopaedia to "ency." and it's pretty clear what it means. But other things were harder; someone had the idea of removing "A" or "The" from book titles, but that doesn't work too well. Imagine, say, the Jack London novel The Call of the Wild. That's going to look a bit silly if it's written up as "Call of Wild." So, even a shop receipt can have some creative processes.

I believe that the word creativity is immediately associated in effect with something that has to do with art, just as you write. But it is the mental processing of communication itself to be because it sets in motion some of our brain functions that respond to impulses, more or less simple thoughts, a sort of free thought, which make us create and manage something we have thought and that does not we were only told to perform.