Caregivers’ chat

Craig is back in the hospital again. He started complaing of pain in his left abdominal area, flank Monday night, but thought it was tummy upset. Pain kept getting worse so Tuesday morning I dropped him off at the ER while I drove to Miami on a business related errand. Turns out he has 3 kidney stones, a 3 mm stone in his bladder, an 11 mm stone still in his kidney, and an obstructing 8 mm stone in the lower third of his left ureter, that's the tube that goes from the kidneys to the bladder for those that don't know. I went and sat in the ER with him after I went to Miami and made the delivery, but left about 6 p.m. last night because I had to pick up a couple of things at grocery that I had forgotten to put on the list, and then had to do a couple of things at the house because we are going to get hit with some pretty nasty weather from this late season hurricane. Yes, it has reached hurricane status, category 1 only thank goodness, but still is putting out some bad weather conditions. The grocery was slammed with people panic buying because of the hurricane, so it took me almost an hour to pick up toilet paper, our usual 12 pack of San Pellegrino water, and some deli fried chicken for my dinner last night.

Craig has had kidney stones several times previously, but it has been at least 6 to 7 years since the last one. The urologist still hasn't been in to see him but, at the size they are, he is probably going to need a laser procedure to break up the 2 big stones, and a stent in his ureter to make sure he passes the remainder of the fragments they aren't able to grab easily. He's going to be a bear when he comes home because the stent itself causes pain. They will give him narcotics for the pain, but he still complained about pain last time even with the fairly high doses they gave him.

I came home after he ate his lunch today because the weather is supposed to start deteriorating fairly quickly now until midday tomorrow.

I've never had a kidney stone (knock on wood). I hope I never do. They sound painful.

One of my neighbors is a flight attendant for United Airlines, and his scheduled trip to Orlando today was canceled. Hopefully the hurricane will weaken to a tropical storm before landfall, and it moves through quickly.

CD
 
Ugh, this all sounds so familiar. We moved my mom out of her condo and in with us (my wife was a saint!). After a year or so, the dementia had progressed to the point where she was becoming a danger (e.g., turning on stoves, wandering outside...). And she lost none of her intelligence- everything we did to try to keep her in her room and bathroom, she'd figure out a way to foil. Fortunately, despite the profound memory losses, she retained her delightful personality.

She's now in a progressive care facility. She was recently moved from gen pop to the lockdown floor because she threatened another inmate with a butter knife (he had started yelling at her and was approaching her in his wheelchair).

The blessing among all this is that she doesn't remember my wife (whom she absolutely adored), so we didn't have to deal with telling Mom about her death.
 
I've never had a kidney stone (knock on wood). I hope I never do. They sound painful.

One of my neighbors is a flight attendant for United Airlines, and his scheduled trip to Orlando today was canceled. Hopefully the hurricane will weaken to a tropical storm before landfall, and it moves through quickly.

CD

I think I remember hearing the airport had closed in Orlando earlier on the news. Disney closed at 5 p.m.

The cone has moved ever so slightly north, which is good for us.

The surfers have been out riding the waves today, even though a lot of beaches have been closed. The waves look like those off the California coast. Only time you can surf here is when a hurricane is pretty much directly approaching from the east to the west.

The waves are eroding the beaches, taking the sand out to sea and also spreading it on the boardwalks and the streets. Boardwalks and sidewalks are collapsing because the sand is washing out from under them.

Water is up over quite a few roads that run right along the coast and water is getting really close to and sometimes slightly in businesses that line them on the west side. No major structural flooding yet, just streets. But, we have King tides again and high tide is in a few hours, so that is probably going to change.

No visit from the urologist so I guess it will be either tomorrow afternoon or Friday before Craig sees one.
 
Craig is scheduled to have a procedure sometime today.

That seems a bit of a long wait from when he was admitted. Hope it all goes well - send him my good wishes.

Fortunately, despite the profound memory losses, she retained her delightful personality.

Yeah - I'm lucky so far as Steve (partner with dementia) is very gentle and wants to help or please me. He never gets angry. I also recognise what you say about retaining 'intelligence'. He is 'wily' and will work out where the alcohol is hidden and help himself first thing in the morning. Its now under lock and key.
 
Yeah - I'm lucky so far as Steve (partner with dementia) is very gentle and wants to help or please me
My dad was fine up until the last 3-4 months. He´d just sit in his chair all day, tell everyone he´d had a good life, rabbit on about life when he was a kid, remember incredible details about his national service,etc. Then all of a sudden, he started to wake up in the middle of the night, bang on doors, shout obscenities, and say he wanted to go home.
 
My dad was fine up until the last 3-4 months.
With my MIL, she was always the type to acquiesce to everyone around her, always willing to give in on anything to make someone else happy.

Once the dementia set in, she became stubborn as a mule. Never violent, never loud or angry, but frequently…uncooperative and disagreeable. Didn’t matter what it was, she was against it if you were for it, or the other way around.
 
My dad has deteriorated more in the last year than he had in the previous ten years. A year ago, he was still driving a car, although badly (we should have taken the keys sooner -- that was my fault). He could still walk, although not without occasionally falling.

CD
 
This is going to seem a strange thing to post, but I’m a little put off by something. That something is that yesterday, my brother (who’s back in town for a visit after moving a state away a couple of months ago) visited my dad and sent everyone a pic of my dad at his care facility.

What’s the bother? They’ve got my dad sort of dressed up for Halloween. He’s wearing a witch’s hat with neon green hair.

Why does that bother me? For his entire life (as far as I know), my dad has hated every non-Christian/secular holiday (and that includes Christmas). He’s always railed against them, forbade them being observed by us as kids, and thoroughly discredited as either superstitious paganism or manipulative commercialism.

Seeing my dad sitting in a chair, hat and hair on, with that sort of blank dementia stare…it’s irritating me more than it should, as I know if he had a say in it, he’d throw that get-up in the garbage and soundly thump whomever put it on him.
 
My dad was fine up until the last 3-4 months. He´d just sit in his chair all day, tell everyone he´d had a good life, rabbit on about life when he was a kid, remember incredible details about his national service,etc. Then all of a sudden, he started to wake up in the middle of the night, bang on doors, shout obscenities, and say he wanted to go home.

Maybe something like that will happen eventually. The difference is that Steve remembers almost nothing about his life. He can't remember relationships, jobs he had or even his childhood. He knows he comes from Sunderland but seems to think I found him there and brought him down here.
 
This is going to seem a strange thing to post, but I’m a little put off by something. That something is that yesterday, my brother (who’s back in town for a visit after moving a state away a couple of months ago) visited my dad and sent everyone a pic of my dad at his care facility.

What’s the bother? They’ve got my dad sort of dressed up for Halloween. He’s wearing a witch’s hat with neon green hair.

Why does that bother me? For his entire life (as far as I know), my dad has hated every non-Christian/secular holiday (and that includes Christmas). He’s always railed against them, forbade them being observed by us as kids, and thoroughly discredited as either superstitious paganism or manipulative commercialism.

Seeing my dad sitting in a chair, hat and hair on, with that sort of blank dementia stare…it’s irritating me more than it should, as I know if he had a say in it, he’d throw that get-up in the garbage and soundly thump whomever put it on him.

This seems wrong to me too. Its disrespectful and the care workers should have known about his beliefs. I'm not surprised it bothered you. Luckily, it seems he was oblivious to it but I would be inclined to have words with the care home.
 
He still is in hospital and no procedure due to some issues with doctors, insurance and confusion about who said/did what according to the story we have been given. He supposedly is scheduled for tomorrow. If that doesn't happen, I'm having him be discharged and will take him to another hospital. I'm so incredibly irritated and angry about this as the CT scan last Monday showed his affected kidney was already swollen with fluid then because of the huge stone in it and they have been giving him fluids since then.
 
He still is in hospital and no procedure due to some issues with doctors, insurance and confusion about who said/did what according to the story we have been given. He supposedly is scheduled for tomorrow. If that doesn't happen, I'm having him be discharged and will take him to another hospital. I'm so incredibly irritated and angry about this as the CT scan last Monday showed his affected kidney was already swollen with fluid then because of the huge stone in it and they have been giving him fluids since then.

The last time I was in a hospital, it was retty much the same. The problem was that there were six doctors, all doing their own thing, for the simple purpose of being able to bill me and my insurance company. I got out of the hospital in worse shape than when I went in.

BTW, hospitals love giving patients fluids. They must make a lot of money off of those IV bags. I blew up like a water balloon.

Stay tough with the hospital. Their number one priority is making as much money as they can from you and your insurance company. You have to keep the pressure on.

CD
 
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