Lifestyle changes

MypinchofItaly said:
It may happen that the lack of sleep is compensated to some extent by eating a little too much, but it is only temporary and the fact that your body has now got used to a change is good news, as you say.

It's good that you continue to walk a lot :highfive:
I'm going for a run later today and hope I don't collapse from the heat! Maybe I should wait until midnight :laugh:
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If it's that hot swimming or not doing anything is probably better :hug:

And yeah, it's only a day. Tomorrow has new chances
 
Windigo said:
If it's that hot swimming or not doing anything is probably better :hug:

And yeah, it's only a day. Tomorrow has new chances
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Ah yes, maybe it would be better to do nothing or wait for the heat to subside. I really like to run through the countryside. The fields of wheat and corn are a wonderful stimulus, even if only to walk through them. I always carry a small bottle of water with lemon drops in it to cool down from the heat :)
 
Windigo said:
Hey I'll get back to you in PM :hug: but I am too tired now.

Just in short: stepson was never meant to go to his grandma, as she's very old and very frail + chronically ill. But she demanded he come live with her because 'no grandson of mine ends up on the street' which is admirable were it not that his illness is far beyond her ability to care for and it's not without reason that both my husband and I have a burnout from caring from him and he gets rejected and thrown out from mental health institutions all the time. That's because his illness is extremely servere and he does not cooperate with anything.
Currently he is defecating and urinating anywhere in her house, destroying stuff and being generally unmanagable. So from day one, it's been extremely urgent that he goes to another care home but nobody wants him because of exactly the above.
All we can do now is wait for him to become legally insane, which he will be in a about two months and then from there we can take more serious measures. Right now most problems are because he's legally still sane and can refuse treatment.

When I came to live with my husband, my stepson was still relatively 'normal' but the past two years have seen him descend into full blown madness. It is really sad, but as long as he can refuse treatment he will only keep destroying everything he comes across, including himself
:(
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Oh, dear. I read this yesterday and meant to respond. It's been a bit stressful here lately. I am so sorry you are still going through this. How old is he? IIRC, early 20s.

I don't know how it works where you are but here you can get the police to take someone to a mental health hospital where they are evaluated and held for at least 72 hours. My husband did that to me twice (so he could tell the judge I was unfit. She completely ignored the fact that the psychiatrist's records showed I didn't need to be there).

Can you get some kind of emergency injunction through his doctor?

Oh, hon. I wish I could fix this for you. Please know that I care. :hug:
 
MypinchofItaly said:
Here it is. Sedatol gocce, I take 10 drops to dilute in water.
I am less anxious and I sleep well which is the most important thing and not waking up as if I just crushed against a wall 😅. Not feel asleep during the day, I have energy enough.
Then having started to run helps, I missed to run very much as it was a safety valve beside being a physical exercise to stay fit.

View attachment 65864
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I'm going to check that out. I'm glad it's working!
 
Windigo said:
It definitely hurts, you don't want to see any child on the streets and even less a child/stepson of your own.
But he is not a child, he is 21 and a legal adult who refuses to get treatment and expects everyone to put up with his issues. On top of that he can get violent and abusive.
So thats where we have to draw a line, if only to protect his younger brother.
He is NOT coming back here no matter what, and therefore our last hope is him getting declared insane and getting institutinalized. It isn't quite what a parent hopes for, but better than him being homeless.

His grandmother now, also agrees he can't live with anyone like this. So she supports our decision to declare him insane finally.
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Does he an actual diagnosis of anything? "Insane" isn't a declaration in itself.
 
Morning Glory said:
That's good. I think you are doing the right thing however difficult. I'm not sure if it would take so long in the UK to get him 'sectioned'. But obviously the system is different in the Netherlands.
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Sadly, in many places. I was reading something several months ago that basically said more than half of US prisoners have some kind of major mental illness. It made me wonder how many homeless or about-to-be homeless people committed crimes just to have somewhere to sleep and eat. I guess it's the chicken or egg thing.
 
Windigo said:
Unfortunately our mental health system is very privatized, and there's no profit in caring for severely ill people like him so there are very few places who want him. Even less when he's still ' sane' because then they can't take measures to prevent him doing damage.

So as a last resort he needs to be declared insane now, which is a sad thing indeed because that means he will be facing a hard time. But he would without treatment as well.
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I can't recall if I mentioned this to you before but the mental health clinic is our town owns five properties. Each one has about 5-6 apartments in them. There is a shared kitchen and activities room and group therapy a few times per week.

I don't know if you can find something like that where you are? I would call the local domestic violence center, social worker at the hospital and attorneys if I was facing that situation.

Does he have a mental health provider or does he refuse therapy?
 
Doing okay. Yesterday was tolerable. I had emails and pms from friends encouraging me to stay strong and to remind me the storm is almost over. I also focused on not beating myself up (I wouldn't dare talk to anybody else the way I talk to myself sometimes). I also did some extra homework in my graphic design class to keep my mind on something I enjoy doing. The physical therapist said I did great. I walked the whole length of the hallway twice. I'm okay with my progress. Rome wasn't built in a day.

How is everybody doing?
 
TastyReuben said:
I read that entirely differently and thought, "How odd to combine those two in the same sentence!" :laugh:
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You are so crazy!

lol (9).gif
 
mjd said:
I can't recall if I mentioned this to you before but the mental health clinic is our town owns five properties. Each one has about 5-6 apartments in them. There is a shared kitchen and activities room and group therapy a few times per week.

I don't know if you can find something like that where you are? I would call the local domestic violence center, social worker at the hospital and attorneys if I was facing that situation.

Does he have a mental health provider or does he refuse therapy?
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Windigo has been through all these type of options. Her stepson is extremely severely mentally ill and has been diagnosed as such. The system in the Netherlands is not the same as in the US or the UK. Hope you don't mind me speaking on your behalf Windigo. As you know, I've followed your story closely and I know you are acting in the only way possible after exhausting all other options.
 
Morning Glory said:
Windigo has been through all these type of options. Her stepson is very severely mentally ill and has been diagnosed as such. The system in the Netherlands is not the same as in the US or the UK. Hope you don't mind me speaking on your behalf Windigo. As you know I've followed your story closely and I know you are acting in the only way possible after exhausting all other options.
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Thank you for sharing that. I am still wading through posts trying to keep up. Hopefully, my current stress will dissipate soon so I can focus.

Here's an extra hug, Windigo :hug:(and you too MG)... :hug:
 
mjd said:
Does he an actual diagnosis of anything? "Insane" isn't a declaration in itself.
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Of course he does, I understand you have a lot on your plate yourself but I've written extensively about it on here. I am very tired so getting back at you later. In short:

He has classic autism, developmental delay ( hes 21 but thinks like a 12 yo) , incontinence without physical cause ( and he uses it to pressure people, he can actually hold it but doesnt care or want to) , severe OCD, light auditory hallucinations, and ADHD. And he is agressive and verbally abusive.

Things like forced psychiatric evaluationa only happen here when he's declared insane, no matter his list of diagnoses. He's still sane by law.
 
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